Flourishing in Challenging Times

How do you flourish when times are tough? You play the difficult hand as well as you can. You face what challenges you wholeheartedly; you muster as much patience and compassion as is possible; you learn what the experience has to teach you; you give as much as you can to other people; and you don't lose sight of the beauty in the world and within.

Elements of Flourishing

Feeling good and doing well, loving deeply and living ethically, these are all elements of flourishing.

Psychology, Meditation and Yoga and Flourishing

Psychology, meditation and yoga each contribute to flourishing. Pursued by themselves they are each valuable, but incomplete, neglecting certain vital aspects of what it means to be a person. But when they are carefully integrated, they are richer then when they are studied alone.

Flourishing and A Life of Meaning

One of the key ingredients in flourishing is creating a life of meaning. And that is a highly personal matter, which involves both nurturing ourselves and being devoted to something more than just our own fulfillment.

Two Obstacles to Flourishing

Two obstacles to flourishing: following someone else’s blueprint for how to live or not feeling entitled to a life that is ours alone.

Flourishing and Marital Conflict

Here is a radio interview with me on Fair Fighting

http://webtalkradio.net/category/podcasts/communication360-with-philip-and-lisa-mulford/feed/

WebTalkRadio.net » Communication360 with Philip and Lisa Mulford

webtalkradio.net

In response to yesterday's post about the ethical gap between our actual behavior and our cherished ideals, Maksim Grinman sent me a link to a recent study suggesting that under the pressure of real life embodying our values is often more difficult than we realize ( http://www.wired.com/wiredsciece/2011/04/shocking-experiment-money/

Why do you think that is?

Ethics and The Art of Flourishing

“They pray during the weekends and sin during the week,” my best friend used to say when we were teenagers, describing some of the adults in our community. Since then I have been interested in the “ethical gap” – the distance between our moral ideals and actual behavior. Lessening that gap and embodying our most cherished values is crucial to the art of flourishing. 


The feedback of close friends, self-reflection, meditation, psychotherapy, studying our dreams, reading inspirational spiritual and religious texts, and participating in communities of moral accountability are some of the ways we can do this. 


What has helped you lessen your own ethical gaps?

Flourishing Is More Than Happiness

Flourishing is more than happiness. Happiness is state of feeling good. But you can flourish and not feel good -- like when you are lovingly taking care of someone close to you who is sick -- and you can feel good and not be thriving; think of a deadbeat Dad who is pleased he beat the system. Flourishing is thriving and doing well -- which sometimes takes the form of playing a difficult hand well. Happiness is a byproduct of a life well-lived.

What stops intimacy

The number one obstacle to healthy intimacy? Money? Sexuality? In-laws?
Nope. It’s trying to "win;” striving to defeat your spouse when you disagree. Which makes him/her an opponent instead of a partner and the relationship -- despite your commitment -- an adversarial battle. The alternative to winning is really hearing where your partner is coming from and trying to understand them. What do you think?